The mind is a terrible thing to waste

Nowadays there's a lot of tension building in the majority of the population. Maybe I'm the only one but I'm definitely sensing it in a lot of people. Probably a mixture of things. Today we remember 9/11, others hyped over the political race, and other might have that on top of their daily stresses. Something about the air though has got me distraught though. I'll start off by saying i'm not sad or depressed or anything along those lines but recently I've been feeling worthless. Not like the shameful kind of worthlessness that makes you feel down in the dumps but the insignificant feeling that can come with the feelings of worthlessness. The kind of insignificance that makes you wonder your part in the world. It's been a while since things got deep so why all of a sudden out of nowhere some mysterious force or entity or just pure chance has dropped an exponentially large load on my thought process.. I mean come on who does that? I've got such bigger fish to fry and worry about that than how I am feeling. I've got school, I've got the gym, I've got work, I've got family, I've got friends, and many other things crossing my mind before I start thinking about the world and my part in it. I understand all the theories about like the butterfly effect or if you went back in time just your presence being there would change everything thus making everyone and everything significant in the grand scheme of things, but are we?... Time doesn't stop for us, so as humans we just keep on moving. yeah of course we'll stop to mourn and stuff for example like today but for most of us that didn't directly lose someone on 9/11 do you stop on a daily basis to think about those that did die? A strong portion of people don't, but does that now make us insensitive? To only care about those that died on the anniversary of their departure? It is a different story for those that lose a loved one and for the most part(i guess) a lot of them would want you to look for love again and to not let your life get stagnant but is that right do with regard to time and our part in the world? And now that all that is said where do we fit in all this? where do i fit in general? How do i know I'm living my life right when most signs point to no. Do i stick with the logicality of it all or do I go with that gut feeling. the butterflies that tell you your doing a good thing or that wrench twisting when something doesn't feel right. Why are we getting all caught up in things that are irrelevant to happiness and why can't i get all this off my mind... I'm not supposed to be the thinking type. i'm just a laborer. A brother. A son. A friend... so why am I thinking all of a sudden?

A blog post?? About damn time!

Yeah so it's been a while and my homeboy Brannon inspired me to write a blog post via a fb status I wrote that was only meant to be poetic but that's not the point! Point is I left you guys hanging! Gotta let you know what's good in my life right?? Well I'll work into all that over time with an actual schedule to my posts. But now that I'm back I kinda wanna talk about my goals made around new years time. I'm actually doing pretty damn well. On two of them at least. I got a car about two months ago and man she's a beauty. 2001 VW Passat. Got her for a steal and she's awesome. Still needs a touch of work but she runs like a charm. Did I mention she's got standard transmission and a sunroof? Hell yea!! Haha anyways I got that and I'm paying for this semester out of pocket meaning I'm making money right? Well I'm making enough to get by but not as much as I'd like. I was working at cross creek golf club and got fired because they wanted to work with someone new but really their finances were so bad they had to let me go. Like seriously bad. Like they couldn't get me gosh damned squeegee so I could properly clean the effing floors. But uh you didn't hear that from me lol. Anyways I'm making my pay through putting on the ritz again and this weekend was hell but it's money towards school.

But now there was that third goal that was my number 1 goal. Yep the BIG one. Like that FATTEST thing on my mind lol. Yeah I'm still big old Andrew and yeah I've been talking about weight loss for years but I dunno. I've just been slacking. I think deep down I'm afraid of the change but who knows. All I can say is though I wanna change. I wanna see a new me in te mirror everyday. I want girls to actually see me and wanna come up and talk to me. To make everyone proud including myself. I don't have self confidence issue so that boldness on a chiseled body and, whew man, all you ladies would just melt away at first glance at me haha. But that's the thing though. I have all this delusion and grandeur even though I've managed to straighten everything else out. It urks me guys but that's not to say I've made no progress. My shoulders are looking and feeling glorious. I just haven't gotten everything up to par and it's mostly been my cardio I need to work on. So enough talk right? The one goal has to be met. No deadline. Fuxk that. We're going for results and results alone. You heard? I got all the damn time in the world now that I've been fired, why the hell arent I body rockin yet!?

So yeah thats what's been goin on with my goals and I'm gonna keep on writing. Maybe if I can blog about all I eat and burn as well as the daily bitching, then heck maybe I can be set by before winter. Oh and just for the hell of it, I'm adding a picture of huijin being awesome. "She eats gamers like you for breakfast"

Another day, another dollar...spent

Don't even know what to write about. hardly any weight lost though i'm not gaining. still in debt. and still have bertha. fuck it. not giving up just worried about school and fitting everything in. doesn't help catering is so slow and they know i need work. like i said fuck it. i'll scrape by and just end the summer with not as much money saved up as i'd like. but that's all old same old stuff you guys already know lol. what's going on now? i had a happy valentines day. the night going into the 14th i stayed up late playing skyrim and infection on CoD with Charlie and his brother Thomas. it was awesome and waking up after that felt real good. went to bed around 4, woke up at 10. *beware this next part may hurt your views of me but i feel it's important to the story* smoked up before going to nutrition. had a huge smile on my face and meant it when i said happy valentines day to all the lovely ladies in my class. the tweets i posted that morning were pretty funny too haha check em out i'm @PoppaSamurai on twitter. anways then i saw sam and we talked the entire time before class. she's so awesome lol. anyways we talked and then after like 4 hugs and fuck valentines day remarks i changed for my candy making class and was on my way. it was good. the candies we made were spectacular and chef milborn made us bananas foster. i guess the closest number between 1-50 so i got the big one hehe. after that same came back and drove me home. funny too cause she reads this and is gonna be like omg stop talking about me on your blogggggg.
-dont know if you've noticed but i've given up on most spelling and grammar issues here just cause i'm feeling tired and off today but anyways-
after she dropped me off i had a snack and got to some skyrim for a while. it's such a fun game you guys should play it if you're into freedom and killing dragons and shit. so awesome. anyways.

i don't feel like typing much more so i'll sum up yesterday as shabby and today as crappy with some good things in the mix but it's really just my attitude that's been the problem. kinda down cause it's one of those days where you over think everything about one little thing but i digest. cause i just ate dinner. lol i know not funny but it's ok i still love you guys ;D

i was gonna ramble about some other things but just not in the mood so hopefully tomorrow morning i'll fill you guys in some more. peace love and happiness yo. much love and feel free to hit a brother up. my cell is on my facebook profile along with an awesome new picture.

Happy New Year Everybody: Time to rant

So here's to the new year starting off not too bad. Well at least no complaints on my part although that being said is going to be contradicted by me ranting and complaining about things people don't like in general BUT regarding the start of this year i'm not complaining. I've been in the gym 5 days a week and this is the 3rd week but I took a rest day cause my shoulder's been bothering me. Something in the tendon or nerve i need to get checked out but it's feeling good now and I should be good to get a great lift in tomorrow. I don't know if i've actually lost any weight because the scales at the gold's gym suck in my opinion. I just think they need to be re-calibrated is all because I was not 295 going into the gym 3 weeks ago but i digress.

My protein finally came in the mail today. I saw that package and my face lit up like the sky on the fourth of july. I'm becoming a bit of a gnc junkie haha. 3 lbs of AMP Wheybolic Extreme 60. Charlie said it's good and all i hear is good things about it. Had a shake today actually. Cookies and Cream! I mean it still tasted like whey protein but I've grown to love that taste. Disgustingly Delicious!! Haven't had any whey protein in a year and a half: before i started my first semester actually. Speaking of school i'm on and off about going back. This semester was a little rough but I'm not gonna talk much about that. just looking forward to a regular schedule again.

Now that i think about it i'm talking about my goals for the new year. That's the news for 1 primary goal, the weight loss, but i do have some good news regarding my second goal, a car. So I've talked about buying an '01 accord from my coworker, juan, or at least i have on my facebook. We've talked recently and he actually mentioned the prospect of actually buying my expedition to repair for himself and giving me his accord. whether he actually buys my car or we swap cars and I pay him some money but all this basically means I'll have a car probably within the next couple of weeks to a month. Good Things coming my way haha.

good looking with a good looking car?

fuck yeahh

I haven't actually ranted yet. maybe i won't. yeah i won't. the world of social media doesn't need anymore drama and bs and bitching put out there. so i'll end on a decent note. had chinese for dinner and just watched Rise of the Planet of the Apes. It was quite the movie. it was pretty darn good haha. now time to wind down and get ready for the gym tomorrow. and maybe some call of duty survival mode would be fun too. Night Everyone( or anyone haha) Hope you all had a wonderful new year's and hopefully see some people soon. hit me up and let's chill. just gotta pick me up hahaha. much love 

New Year's Resolutions(pardon the vulgarity)

Fuck New Year's Resolutions! For real though they're nothing but a crock of shit we tell our selves every year in the hopes of making ourselves better and whatnot. Only problem is they barely last the first week of the year, a month at best. If you're one of those people that actually sticks to your resolution that's honestly so great for you. For me though I'm not making any resolutions, however I am solidifying my goals for the next couple of months and for the whole year. Why? Because for me a goal stays on my mind longer than a "resolution". Weight loss has been a goal for me for years, only problem being i'm never consistent more than a few months because I start working hard or swamped with school(mostly a combo of the two). On that note I'd like to share my goals with you guys. whoever you are haha.

Weight Loss Goal: 235
I'm not so much looking for the number as I am looking to look that weight. I saw Chris Chu and Brandon Mitchell at the gym yesterday and well shit, they look wayyyyyy better than i do(weightloss wise, i'm still way sexier) and Chu said to me that i'm the last big man standing from rezi. and man it is so true. everyone else got skinny or dropped the rest of their baby fat. like austin isn't thick anymore, matt hurlehy has like 4% body fat. All that being said i already ran 3.1 miles before seeing them. after the conversation with them yeasterday, i ran 6 miles in 42 minutes with a steady heart rate between 175-185. Screw all the BS i'm in it to win it now. I should reach my goal before my birthday.
*I gained no weight this semester btw. last fall i gained 30 pounds. who's workin hard now*

Wheels:
So most of you know my car is a gas guzzling piece of crap now that i love to death still but man i need something to save me some gas money and so i can drive around with a little bit of style. what more can i say? i'm gonna just sell bertha for a couple hundred bucks just so i can get rid of it. i'll just get rides to and from school and use the bus every now and then. no big deal right? Ideally I'd like to have a car between april and may.

Money$$$:
I don't know how many people actually have money as a goal or resolution for new years other than the idea of having money in pocket for good luck when the ball drops. I always struggle with money so this year is gonna be different. I'm going to have my credit debt paid off sometime by or before april and for the year i'd like to have a couple thousand saved up. i made like 6k this year just part timing at the catering company so once i have a real job or really just guaranteed hours of work every week i can actually save. pretty sweet right? oh and that's a couple thousand on top of already getting a decent set of wheels. livin the life right?

So those are my 3 primary goals. If those are all achieved then many other great things are sure to follow. should be graduated in the spring of 2013 and once graduated i'll move out and continue pursuing my dreams. trying to get that food truck opened up and what not. Get a decent apartment with somebody. once I'm looking good and have money, finding a nice girl should be a walk in the park.

It's been one hell of a year. these next couple of months aren't gonna be easy either but once it's passed, i think i can finally be really happy again. much love everybody. Happy New Year if i don't get around to writing a new post until the new year and hope everyone had a decent holiday season.
peace, love, and happiness yo.

I'm not depressed but/what's happened in 2 weeks/ foood

I wanna get this out first: i'm not suicidal or nothing, but im always wondering how people would react if i died or killed myself like right now. all my dreams, hopes, and love would cease to exist. i believe there are probably quite a few people other than my immediate family that would be truly hurt by that but the thing is i don't see it everyday. it makes me think why don't we show our love for people on the daily basis? for serious why the fuck are you gonna wait for me to die before you realize you wanted to tell me or anyone else that you loved them? life is too short and way to spontaneous for that. I'm not messing around when i urge you love your family, friends, and neighbors on a daily basis. when you lose someone like that there;s no getting them back. it's a wrap. I lost my grandfather in february, a month i already don't like to begin with anyways, but the thing is i didn't know how much i wanted to actually talk to him until right before he got sick. my point is i lost something that i can never get. I don't know why i do it but i love you all for some strange mysterious reason. i feel no hatred towards any human for that matter and i try my best to make it clear to you all whenever i get the chance. if you need anything ever i got you or will try my best to. someone called me for a ride home last night and i couldn't do it but i was ready to steal a car just to help them out. but yeah anyways that's my little piece about that. it's something that always keeps me up at night. not the death, just the feeling of a lack of love.

so this has been a hell of a two weeks. More like a crazy week and a half but yeah. two thursdays ago i worked 39 hours between that thursday and sunday. this past monday to friday i worked 49 hours. that is a heck of a lot of work(just realized i forgot to apologize for the F bomb earlier, nbd right?) so anyways I got a couple of hours of sleep each night and was on my feet basically all day. not too shabby right? well on the brightside im making some decent money now except im only working one job this wednesday and other than that i'm not really doing much this week except my holiday baking and making some empanadas for the lovely amell who's birthday is this thursday. she probably won't even know i'm mentioning this right now lol. I told her i would but she's probably already thinking i'm gonna flake like i did 3 years ago haha. sucks right? i got her though cause i already got the masa ready to be made and some flank steak to season up. What Is Up, Girl??? I GOT YOU!! lol anyways now that i'm talking about food let's get the fat part of the samurai going in the blog finally right? okay so i'll get my negative out of the way now. i tried making a twist on a french onion soup but more so kind of a vegetarian one by using a mushroom stock i made instead of beef stock. well i had started it on thursday night but didn't get to monitor it like i should have. well when i finally got to taste it it had burnt on the bottom. heart..broken... had to dump it out and i was pretty hurt but screw it; you win some and you lose some. today though i did make a quick quiche. all you gotta do is have some pie crusts frozen ready or make your own. i had some frozen one's already in tins so it was perfect. for a quiche all you need is

eggs
milk or cream
cheese
and any filling you'd like to put in

    That's the beauty of a quiche, if you wanted to put bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips you could or go for the traditional kind of quiche lorraine you can. for me i was just working what i had. so i had eggs, whole milk, cheddar cheese, and a can of hot rotel. it came out very nicely and i seasoned the filling with garlic powder and onion powder. like i said it was a quick quiche. normally i prefer to utilize fresh ingredients.
                                   *note*
prebake the pie shells. the crust will just be soggy on the bottom because of the moisture from the filling so preback the shells with something inside like beans so the crust doesnt inflate. even if you dock it(poke holes on bottom) it can still seperate of puff up too much. another method if you don't have beans is to place another pie tin inside of your crust to be baked and bake upside down. the gravity works its magic quite nicely.

so that's a quiche. delicious and perfect for breakfast at any time of the day.

now here's something for you guys: Abuelita's empanadas.
So if you've never heard me speak of these well then i probably don't know you at all haha. Now this isn't the original recipe(because i don't know it) or the traditional method(because most of you wouldnt do it that way anyways lol) but it is a pretty delicious recreation i made in class that everyone effing loved. so what you'll need is

Yellow Masa(can be found in any latino store)
ground beef( 2 pounds will feed a family)
  cumin
  garlic
  paprika
  oregano
  salt
  black pepper
  tomato paste

really not much to it at all but i'll break this down nice and well for you. now basically masa is a sort of corn flour used in quite a bit of latin american cuisine and can be used for so many more things such as in your breading for fried chicken or fish. trust me it's ten times better. it is used for making breads and tortillas and tamales and arrepas and bollo(panamanian and colombian). anyways lets get started.

-the bag of masa you buy will have mixing directions so just add warm water and mix until you have a dough that doesn't stick to the side of the bowl. it'll stick to your hands a bit but now worries it's kind of supposed to. cover that in plastic wrap and leave in the bowl you mixed it in or on your counter space.
                     If you want to bake the empanadas you're gonna need to add some lard or butter to the masa otherwise the masa will dry out completely and come out looking like cracked desert rock. otherwise if youre going to fry them instead then use just the masa and water.


-now for the beef: season it in a small bowl first and mix it really well. be very generous with your seasoning minus the salt and pepper. don't be over bearing with it(salt) or even use it all until around the end of the production. brown the beef like you would any other taco meat. once you start getting some good color season with a bit more cumin and oregano because you probably didn't add enough but if you did kudos to you! quickly add a good amount of tomato paste, proabbly about a cup and a half, 12 ounces, and the beef will be a nice thick consistency. don't cook any more just keep nice and warm and taste and season with salt and pepper as needed cause it will need a small but nice strong pinch of salt. if anything with the beef you don't want it  cooked all the way cause it undergoes a second cooking within the masa.

-now time for the make up: take a small-medium frying pan and a flat surface like a cutting board or sheet tray and wrap them tightly in plastic wrap. this is going to be your homemade tortilla press station! yayyyy. so this part is easy after your first two or three attempts at it but once you got it you'll be pumping out empanadas in no time. so grab some of your masa in a ball shape(it shouldn't be sticking to your hand but feel sticky at the same time. i should've mentioned this before but it ain't no thang. so take a small ball of masa and press it evenly down on the flat surface using the round frying pan. you'll have a lovely round flat piece of masa. this is basically a tortilla lol. place some of the beef filling on the masa flat and then fold in half. crimp with a fork and place on a sheet tray with parchment paper for baking or just for holding until you fry them. conrgatulations on making your first empanada! i hope you feel as happy as i did when i made my first good one. i was literally a second away from a single nostalgic tear rolling down my burly hairy cheeks. what can i say i love my abuelita and empanadas was something that just hits down home for me. if you want something to serve with this i got two suggestions. first is a simple pico de gallo. dice some tomatoes, slice some red and sweet onions, chop cilantro, and toss with salt, pepper, and lime. simple and delicious. add a jalapeno if you want more of a salsa kick. just make sure you dice, slice, and chop everything nice and finely so it can be eaten easily with the empanada OR you could even puree it and have it like a sauce but this next thing knocks everything else out of the park. courtesy of my great classmate orlando. he said you're not eating empanadas if you don't have this sauce with it. all you need is

mayo
cilantro
garlic
         OR if you want to be fancy and make an aioli take a lot of cilantro and enough garlic and puree it
you'll also need
4 egg yolks
juice of one whole lemon
25ish oz of decent-good olive oil

if you make the simple version just process or blend the three ingredients and season and play around with the taste. it needs to be heavy on garlic but have a strong amount of cilantro to add freshness, flavor, and tonedown and compliment the garlic at the same time.

for the aioli you can whisk by hand or process it, whichever your little heart desires. just take some of your puree and egg yolks and mix. slowly drizzle the oil in and watch the magic happen as it emulsifies. you're basically making mayonnaise haha. samething applies flavorwise just don't forget to add the lemon juice in. it helps emulsify everything together

well bon appetite everyone.

so i was going to talk about my past couple of years and how shitty they've been and how tough they've been on my psyche and self esteem but ya know i think that first part was enough shit for the all of us so maybe it's best i leave the past behind me even though it's with me everyday. you feel me? anyways I hope you enjoyed the food reading. this isn't so much a food blog as it is a blog about my life but heck at least you can get away with some good food tips and recipes and stories. enjoy everyone! peace, love and happiness yo.

from shit to shit yeah/ so tired

HOly CRAP I'm so freaking tired right now. it was a pretty damn good way to start december though. for serious. the rest of this past week i'd been pretty down on account of my car being all broken and what not. it's like november had me feeling all the stress of the present and the past all in one short time: i was feeling really lonely and school's getting tough and no money and being in debt puts a lot of pressure on the psyche and pressure to lose weight all just weighing me down but then came the start of december and for some strange reason these past couple of days have been so beautiful to me and i'm not just talking about the weather which has been pretty freaking fabulous after the cold mornings pass but i don't being chilly since i get so hot all the time. it's nice to be able to cool off.

so thursday was a decent day, got some baking done in class( delicious soufflés, i'll talk about em in a bit) and practiced my cake decorating skills by making some ravens themed cakes. Dallas fan first but was feeling like working with some purple so ravens were a good choice to me. they were alright but i had plenty of fun working on em and didn't realy have any worries that day. December first came and i had a mind as clear as day. friday wasn't bad at all either. friday woke up about 10, went for a walk, went to class, and then charlie picked me up so we could just chill before we headed to work that night. played madden, ate some cauliflower curry and cilantro rice, tossed the football around definitely, and relaxed and listened to music until 830 when we got ready for work. *clocked in 8:50* we get to the warehouse and things were already a hot chaotic mess because bobby was freaking out because of his time concerns. we got thrown into the action and basically work our asses off melting chocolate and making hot cocoa. wait wait wait. that's it? chocolate and hot cocoa? I need to quit my bitching? alright how bout you melt chocolate and make hot chocolate for over 20,000 people. as if making wasn't bad enough already i loaded one truck of just the hot cocoa cambro's(insulated carriers) mostly by myself. my back is still stiff haha. anyways we bust our asses 9pm-330am. this is the time most people get off work at the latest but baby we were just getting started. 330 the other employees show up to help us finish loading the fruit for the job(which was a marathon btw) and then we roll out about 4am and Bobby(owner of the company) is flipping his wig and ready to pull the rest of his hair out because the whole caravan wasn't right behind him. Joel couldn't find the keys to one of the trucks and so bobby was about ready to cry. terrible but i understand cause that man is under so much stress. anyways we get to some huge lot by the national harbor to unload everything and set up. it's 4 am, i'm already tired and things are hectic and labor intensive. long story short it wasn't too bad at work after the bobby chaos passed. everything was smooth, laid back, and the wages were inceased that day. oh and there were so many hot females there. like i saw a white girl with a nicki minaj ass and my jaw dropped. so many attractive ladies. we get back to the warehouse and unload. we clocked out at *3:15 pm* worked 18 and a quarter hours. that's some quality working time right there

What really makes yesterday so amazing though was after work. a hot shower had me so refreshed and revitalized my body. literally the best shower I've had in my whole life so far. pardon my french but fucking fantastic. afterwards charlie and i went to denny's. we're waddling out of his car and barely making it to the door and to a booth hahaha. our waitress was so nice and on point and so chill and laid back that she made our day we had to make her day. charlie left her an amazing tip and i told her that she basically brightened and made our whole day. she loved it and it felt good knowing it did. we get back and are barely getting through one game of madden when charlie's falling asleep while the playclock keeps running haha. he took the mattress and i took the long couch and with the space heater on we were out in a heartbeat. best night of sleep in a while.

slept from like 9-9. we woke up, went for a ride, tossed the football around, and tried one last game of madden before he left to get his stuff done. got my ass whopped but no complaints here cause it was a good game. after he left i went straight to the kitchen. brought home two 20# boxes of apples from work so decided im gonna make some apple cider. it came out nicely after i made it mulled but the plain stuff was hanging pretty well by itself. so nice. victoria(vicki lol) came over to bake stuff(I did most of it haha) but it was chill. baked chocolate chip cookies and apple bread. after she left i started some homework and then boom here I am now writing this here little blog. not too shabby. forgot to mention i watched football today. yes i saw dallas lose in overtime because we missed a field goal. not mad though. and thanks to redzone i got lots of football action. so nice.

at this point im thinking im going to talk about the food later cause i've already written so much and the quicker im done i can go to bed. think im sleeping on the floor though cause i have all my clean clothes on there. half folded/half spread everywhere. the reason i brought up all that up was cause charlie mentioned a really good point. the brightest dawn comes after the darkest night. so much truth behind that statement. so to keep the philosophy going i'll leave you with my bit. Peace, love, and happiness, guys.

Though tomorrow isn't always a better day, as long as you just try a little harder to get out of the hole you're in then we'll be just fine